Oct 30, 2009

If I'm Going Down...

Musings of A Beautiful Mess
I'm going to go down with a FIGHT! Lately, I've been feeling as if going to school is a waste of time. I know it isn't, but all this time I'm spending away from my family is rough on me. It isn't so much that I'm away from them all the time, yeah Tuesdays suck, but that's only one day a week. It's that Dirty and I went into this with the idea of me going to school was going to supplement our income. He wouldn't get another job and he wold stay home with the kids.He'd draw his unemployment until he couldn't anymore and then when that ended, we would have my financial aid to fall back on. We would even have a few months where we could get BOTH. My financial aid and grant money would just sit in the bank and we would live off his unemployment. Sounds like a pretty responsible plan, right? Well no, it isn't. Because I haven't gotten ONE dime from ANYBODY! AND to top it off, I have a pretty $2,000 bill with my name on it at the school. This should be paid in December when I get my grant money, but this was suppose to be paid before I started school.

I've called financial aid many times and have been told that my application will be processed at the end of October. Well here it is, then end of October and I haven't heard shit from anyone. I need to register fro winter term in a few weeks, but I won't be able to do that until financial aid pays my FALL term. And if they don't pay for that, then I can't register for winter term and I'm screwed for my grants and loans for the rest of the year. I've held up my end of the bargain this whole time. I've gone to every one of my classes and I'm getting an A in everyone, yet I still feel as if I'm getting screwed. What the hell am I going to do if this term doesn't get paid for? I don't get the credits I've earned and I really did waste my time. All this time away from the kids and Dirty will be for nothing. The field trips I've missed, the volleyball games I've missed, all of it...a waste of time!

I'm going to talk to my campus today and see what I can do because I really have no clue. I'm going to apply for every scholarship I can find in the hopes of SOMETHING good coming my way. I'm going to try not to stress about this, but it isn't going to be easy. I can't get it out of my head. I can't stop thinking about the worse case scenario. Which is I have to drop out and I screw myself for the rest of the year *sigh* Please send me some vibes, I could really use them. Just some calming vibes, some clarity ones too. ANYTHING!

21 friends have commented:

GeekByMarriage on October 30, 2009 at 12:03 PM said...

Oh, Sweetie! I am so sorry it's all in a jumble for you. Hang in there! You're my supreme hero for going back to school! Loves you lots!

Chayce's Momma on October 30, 2009 at 12:05 PM said...

I always say that good things come to good people. So I believe that it will all work out for you. Just keep doing what you're doing, you're doing your part and that's all you can control.

I hope it gets better!!!!

The Muser (aka Beautiful Mama) on October 30, 2009 at 1:07 PM said...

oh no! Definitely sending good vibes your way!

Mugsy on October 30, 2009 at 1:13 PM said...

I have packaged up and sent you all the good ju-ju I have. I know it's hard, but I think it will all work out. If I remember correctly, grants, financial aid and the like always come through at the last minute. I know it's tough right now, but I still think you're doing the right thing and will be the kick assiest nurse around.

yummysushipajamas on October 30, 2009 at 1:38 PM said...

This kind of stress SUCKS. I am so sorry you're dealing with it at all. I'll be crossing my fingers and hoping for a good, quick resolution to all of this, because I honestly believe school is good for you!

Kymberli on October 30, 2009 at 3:14 PM said...

Does the system show that you are due the grant/aid money? Much of the time, the financial aid office will have the records showing a total of the aid that is coming to you. Sometimes it all gets locked up internally and the disbursement date isn't until well after fees were due, but usually in those instances the college won't hold it against you by not allowing you to register, withholding grades, etc.

For example, this past semester, all of Frank's aid from the VA was WAY overdue. He had an outstanding bill of just over $2K for his tuition. His aid should have been paid at the beginning of August, but it wasn't until around the first week in October that he got it.

My sister had a similar problem at her school at the start of the last semester.

When you call, check to see if the aid is there, but "floating." If it is, usually schools don't penalize you while they work out whatever it is they need to on their end before they can get the money to drop.

I really hope they'll get it worked out. Hang in there, D. (((HUGS)))

My name is Andy. on October 30, 2009 at 5:15 PM said...

the system sucks! I hope it gets sorted out Monday morning and that you don't have any more hassles!

{HUGS}}}}

MissMeliss on October 30, 2009 at 5:19 PM said...

oh dear. :( god, i hope you find out soon!!!!! and i hope that you get every single dime you need!

oi. that's just scary.

big hugs!!
melissa

Kristin on October 30, 2009 at 9:20 PM said...

{{{Hugs}}} D. I hope it all gets straightened out soon.

awomanmyage on October 31, 2009 at 11:40 AM said...

Nam myo ho renge kyo - is there anyone else in your class in the same situation? I like to send letters ie. dean of college, head of financial aid (so at least it feels like I'm doing something) or maybe make a friend of someone who can look into the "system" to see if the money is floating around somewhere?

awomanmyage on October 31, 2009 at 11:40 AM said...

Nam myo ho renge kyo - is there anyone else in your class in the same situation? I like to send letters ie. dean of college, head of financial aid (so at least it feels like I'm doing something) or maybe make a friend of someone who can look into the "system" to see if the money is floating around somewhere?

Parenthood For Me on November 1, 2009 at 6:16 AM said...

I hear these of the glitches alot. Be persistent and it will work out. Going back to school won't be for nothing.

Aunt Becky on November 1, 2009 at 8:21 AM said...

*headdesk*

Sending you all sorts of good vibes. I know you can get their heads out of their asses for them. You'll get it all straightened out, love.

Sunny on November 1, 2009 at 1:31 PM said...

I'm so sorry for the headache! I can understand your frustration, you are giving up a lot to go to school, and you want to make sure it's worth it. But I really have faith this can be worked out... it just may take more phone calls and letters from you. You have the money coming, it's YOURS!

Flying Monkeys on November 1, 2009 at 6:33 PM said...

Financial aid is a PITA, a life saver but a PITA. I hope you get things sorted out soon.

Kiss ass on all the A's!

Serendipity on November 2, 2009 at 7:46 AM said...

ahh sweetie that sounds like a real pain in the backside, I really hope it all gets sorted for you soon.

Quiet Dreams on November 2, 2009 at 11:35 AM said...

So sorry! This sucks! Definitely don't go down without a fight...I think it will get worked out, and I know it's so stressful...sending you lots of peaceful energy.

JamieD on November 2, 2009 at 11:49 AM said...

The system sucks ASS. I am so sorry - I have been where you are so many times. Both with the financial aid and missing my home life. I remember at one point trying to get my husband to tell me he wanted me to quit school so then I would have a valid excuse for doing it. But he wouldn't. SIGH.

Hang in there. It is a stupid, bureacratic pain in the ass but it will be worth the sacrifice in the end. My only advice is to stay on the financial aid department's ass. The only way things get done is if you do them yourself.

sunflowerchilde on November 2, 2009 at 11:51 AM said...

How frustrating! The financial aid office should DEFINITELY be helping you with this. That doesn't sound right at all. Keep fighting!

CanadianMama on November 3, 2009 at 10:27 AM said...

You are SO amazing for not giving up! Good for you! Fingers crossed for you and sending money vibes your way!!

KimboSue on November 5, 2009 at 8:14 AM said...

Financial Aid is the DEVIL! They want all your papers filled out in a timely manner, but do they PAY in a timely manner? NEVER!

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