Nov 2, 2009

Happy Birthday, Mom.

Musings of A Beautiful Mess
My little sister, my beautiful mom, handsome dad, and myself at my older sister's wedding. That was such a fun day and a great memory.

My parents at one of their MANY Halloween parties. Yes, that's my mom grabbing my dad's breast...lol!

She would be almost 70 today. I would probably have sent her flowers or we would be going up there this coming weekend. Instead, I'll bake a cake or something a sing her a little song. I knew this day was coming up, how could I forget? And I just kind of pushed it to the back of my mind, thinking I'll deal with it later. Well, it's later. Here I am sorting through these damn emotions again *sigh* It is better, so that's a plus, right? I'm not scared of falling into the Pit of Despair....improvement my friends. No matter how small these steps are, they are still steps.

As much as I would like to crawl into my bed and just be with my sad thoughts today, I know that isn't best for me. So I'll bake her cake today, shed a tear and move on with my day. Not because I have to, but because I know she would want me to. I know she doesn't want me stewing in my grief, plus it isn't healthy for me. I'll sing her a song and then blow out the candles, wishing I wasn't doing it alone, but knowing she is here still.


Mom,
I love and miss you more then I can ever put into words. I miss calling you just because. I miss hearing your voice. I miss smelling your "mom scent". But most of all I miss hearing "I love you". I hope you're celebrating with your mom and brother today. Know even though you're missed terribly, you're never forgotten.
~DC

29 friends have commented:

yummysushipajamas on November 2, 2009 at 11:01 AM said...

This is such a beautiful post. I know your sweet, beautiful mother is watching over you today and every day, and I know she is so proud of what she sees.

Mugsy on November 2, 2009 at 11:06 AM said...

Ah...thanks for sharing (and getting me all teary at work!). Happy Birthday to a woman who shaped such a beautiful friend for so many of us.

Suzy on November 2, 2009 at 11:16 AM said...

So beautiful. I know your Mom is so proud of you. Thanks for giving us an insight to a wonderful woman.

Sending you hugs today!

xoxoxo

Dora on November 2, 2009 at 11:31 AM said...

Lovely post. Your mom raised an awesome daughter.

(Sorry I've been such a terrible commenter lately.)

Caitlin on November 2, 2009 at 11:35 AM said...

What a beautiful way to celebrate her life...wishing you tons of strength today.

((hugs))

Quiet Dreams on November 2, 2009 at 11:37 AM said...

Happy Birthday to your mom.
(((hugs)))

JamieD on November 2, 2009 at 11:49 AM said...

What a sweet tribute to your Mom. I know she is so very proud of you.

My name is Andy. on November 2, 2009 at 12:35 PM said...

What a beautiful tribute!

Sunny on November 2, 2009 at 12:54 PM said...

Happy Birthday to your Mom.

(((((hugs)))))

Flying Monkeys on November 2, 2009 at 2:31 PM said...

That Halloween picture is the BEST! I bet she was a riot!

Happy Birthday to your momma! ((hugs))

Fertility Chick on November 2, 2009 at 2:34 PM said...

Wonderful pictures and wonderful words for your mum.

Thinking about you as you remember your lovely mother on this special day.

Rach on November 2, 2009 at 3:41 PM said...

Oh honey such a beautiful heartfelt post.

She will be with you enjoying that cake....


Much love my friend

xxxxx

Kristin on November 2, 2009 at 4:29 PM said...

Happy Birthday to your mom and many {{{{{hugs}}}}} to you my friend.

Stacie on November 2, 2009 at 5:48 PM said...

Happy Birthday to your mom. Sending love and hugs your way as you remember your mom on this special day.

Parenthood For Me on November 2, 2009 at 7:20 PM said...

Enjoy your cake. Your mom would be proud. Hugs

Lollipop Goldstein on November 2, 2009 at 7:43 PM said...

Abiding with you, sweetie. Happy birthday to your mum.

awomanmyage on November 2, 2009 at 7:55 PM said...

It's a testament to your mum that you're such a loving daughter even now.

awomanmyage on November 2, 2009 at 7:55 PM said...

It's a testament to your mum that you're such a loving daughter even now.

JJ on November 2, 2009 at 9:11 PM said...

Big, big hugs...

Lavender Luz on November 3, 2009 at 9:20 AM said...

Your mom is beautiful. I can see where you get it.

Thinking of you today as you blow out the candles.

Nel on November 3, 2009 at 10:18 AM said...

Such cute and funny pictures! Beautiful post. Your mom did such a good job with you :)

Tina on November 3, 2009 at 11:55 AM said...

I know she's looking down and hearing your birthday wishes. I am sending you lots of strength today.

Belle on November 3, 2009 at 12:33 PM said...

This made me teary. Hope your day is full of strength and happy memories!

natalie on November 4, 2009 at 10:55 AM said...

Beautiful post. She is watching over you, and knows how much you miss her. And I love those pictures :)

talesphoenix on November 4, 2009 at 8:06 PM said...

Thanks for sharing the beautiful and funny sides of your mom. I feel the same way about my grandma. Hugs!

KimboSue on November 5, 2009 at 8:15 AM said...

Happy Birthday Mom! You made a great daughter!

Raelene on November 5, 2009 at 12:23 PM said...

Your words hit very close to home for me. My mom had a mom smell to...when I was young I would call it "Mommy smell" turns out it was white musk...now I wear it all the time. And you are right, your mom is beautiful

tomi on November 8, 2009 at 12:39 AM said...

A little late but *HUGS*

A Mom in Jacksonville, FL on November 9, 2009 at 2:04 PM said...

What great pictures!

Hugs to you!

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