May 27, 2010

Let's Have a Little Chat, Shall We?

Musings of A Beautiful Mess
WHEW has it been awhile since I've been here! And it looks SO different! Thank you Heather for revamping my blog. I love it! It's been a very busy, crazy, and wild few weeks. School is going well....could be going better but I'm not failing anything, so there's that. I'm getting 3 A's and a B; oddly enough the B is in my writing class. I am having THE worst time in this class. I am NOT a very good persuasive writer, but I've got one more essay to write and I'm feeling pretty good about it. OK enough about that, lets get to the good stuff...

Awhile back I had asked ya'll about sexual fantasies and husbands. Dirty has been picking my brain and wants to know what I'm thinking. Which normally isn't a bad thing, but some things are just for me. Ya'll agreed and so I decided not to tell him EVERYTHING, but just a few things. Since I turned 30 my libido has been THROUGH the roof! (think of a cat in heat) We've been both having all kinds of fun with this the past 4 years or so, but lately? Oh goodness! I don't know if it's that I'm out doing things like school and reliving the college years I never had and taking time for myself or what but things in the bedroom area haven't calmed down and from the way he accosts me when I pass him, it doesn't look like they will any time soon. Which, obviously, I am OK with. Since I love to analyze things, I decided to analyze why we've been acting like he just got home from boot camp. Here's what I came up with...

~My confidence is a lot higher than it was before. I'm not at home all the time doing laundry, cooking meals, worrying about who has to be where and what time. I'm actually out doing things for myself. It may be just going to the school for my math class, but for those 2 hours, all I'm thinking about are equations and the idiot in the back who keeps interrupting the professor. This time is my time. Me time does wonders for my libido, apparently.

~I'm not depressed anymore. Obviously this is a no brainier. Being depressed will do NOTHING for ones libido. Kind of hard to have sex when you're crying and sleeping all the time. Least it was for me. Coming to terms with my mom's death and what it meant for me was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do in my life, thus far, but well worth it.

~Going out with my friends. It could be looked at that I do this too much, but I disagree. I did nothing with anyone for about 10 years after I had Nae and Zilla. I wasn't a hermit, I was just very focused on them and other stuff. The nights when I go out with my friends is just for fun and to let all the stress go from school and home. Even if going out on a Thursday with a friend and his brother (which isn't not a great idea because guys LOVE to play drinking games and I lose) and being hung over the next day is "frowned" upon by others, I don't care. This is my life and I'll get away when I can.

~Spoiling myself. I've been buying myself things that I don't "need" but did it anyway because, dammit I deserve it! Spoiling myself with a new pair of jeans or even a new bra makes me feel good, which makes Dirty feel good, if you know what I mean.

~Getting good grades. This is a confidence things because the 2 terms of getting a 4.0 is all ME, but it makes me feel proud of myself and I'm happy We all know a happy woman means a happy rest of the world.

~My hand isn't broken anymore and I don't foresee any surgeries in my future. Being without pain is always a plus.

I don't have time for everything I want to do, but I am getting better at organizing my schedule and that makes me less stressed out. I'm not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but I do the best I can.
Spring term ends in 2 weeks and summer terms starts about 2 weeks after that. Hopefully financial (no) aid will hold up their end of the bargain and I'll be able to attend a few classes over the summer and then start again full time in the fall. If not, then I'll be busy painting and organizing the new house. If THAT doesn't happen, we'll figure something out. We should close June 15th, but nothing has gone according to plan, so I'm not putting any money on anything just yet. I'm hoping I'll be back to blogging and reading blogs with some regularity soon. In the mean time, my nose will be stuck in a book studying for my FINALS!

12 friends have commented:

WiseGuy on May 27, 2010 at 12:46 AM said...

Well, your new blog looks so plush...

and the main issue of the post made me blush! ;-p

(BTW, in real life, it is surely tough to wink and wag the tongue at the same instant).

I am so glad that you are doing awesome in school and that you are loving yourself so.

Can I ask you to do one thing though? Your post headers reveal the time of the post but not the date of the post....is that deliberate?

Mrs. Gamgee on May 27, 2010 at 2:15 AM said...

Lovely new layout!

I think confidence is a real huge factor in feeling sexy. And feeling sexy is more than half of the equation.

CanadianMama on May 27, 2010 at 7:21 AM said...

Okay, I LOVE the new blog design! I especially love the girls having coffee. Can I be the one in purple please (my favorite color )lol!

Anyways, I think you are right on all points and I'm SO happy for you!! Exciting about the house too :)

kate on May 27, 2010 at 7:32 AM said...

WTG on your grades, girl! I know how hard that can be-- GOOD JOB!!!

And yes, you are so right that all those little attitude things can really impact libido. I always felt more interested in sex on days when I'd gotten a really good workout in. Something about the "me" time, plus a feeling of accomplishment made me feel super confident. So I say WORK IT!!

raisingmiles on May 27, 2010 at 7:46 AM said...

Love the layout!

Glad you have so many reasons that boost your libido!

GeekByMarriage on May 27, 2010 at 7:52 AM said...

Wise,

I noticed the date thing last night. Was too tired to fix at the time lol. Date is front and center now.

GeekByMarriage on May 27, 2010 at 8:05 AM said...

You need to help me find my mojo, girlie. Sounds like you have some to spare. Help a sista out!

Quiet Dreams on May 27, 2010 at 9:08 AM said...

I have to admit I'm a bit jealous... ;)

Love the new blog look and I hope things continue to go really well for you--in ALL areas of your life. ;)

Kristin on May 27, 2010 at 4:35 PM said...

WTG D! I'm so happy that you are doing so fabulously. You ROCK chica!

Jamie on May 29, 2010 at 5:07 AM said...

I LOVE the new place! Very cool.

Yes - confidence is HUGE. Confidence in yourself, confidence in your relationship. I know I should find some way to get out with the girls more often because it would do wonders for me.

I am so proud of you!! Getting great grades, making time for yourself, getting ready to close on your new home. You ROCK!!

PFM on May 31, 2010 at 4:12 AM said...

LOve the new look. It is so great to read this and see that things have come together for you and you are HAPPY. I agree with your reasons. Doing things for yourself builds confidence and when you feel better, you feel better with your partner.

Gerardine Baugh on June 6, 2010 at 12:54 PM said...

First: Those are amazing grades- big pat on the back!
I have to agree with each point you made, especially the one about spoiling yourself with something new, even if that new item is a necessity. I go without because someone else needs something, or so I thought.

Have fun with life! You’re feeling great and your school going your way.
Keep up the good work, I am sure Dirty would agree. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge!
Good luck with the house!
Gerardine

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