Mar 16, 2010


Musings of A Beautiful Mess
I have my last final of the term at 3:00 today...EEK! Totally freaking out! I really have NO idea why I'm freaking out, either. I have an A in the class and even if I don't get an A on this final, I'll still get an A...lets just calm down a touch!

Last night in psychology Peaches was acting odd. Since our falling out (her acting like a spoiled brat and moving out without a thank you or many words spoken between us) we've been cordial to each other. We had two classes together this term and will have two classes together next term. It was awkward to be in the same room with her AND sitting together (creatures of habit) but we made it work. There was always small talk like "how's your hand doing?" (her) and "is your brother still in jail from his DUI?" (me) Last night was different. We were chatting and joking with each other just like we use to. There was even a point where she put her arms on my shoulders and gave me a hug...ODD! We made plans to go out tonight with some people from class and I'm just not sure about it. I want to go out and celebrate that this term is OVER(!) but I don't know if I'm ready to go out with HER. Dirty thinks I should go out and have a good time but just keep in mind that Peaches is Peaches and she'll never change.

I would like to be friends again, but I also know that we'll never be close like we use to be. Since the day she moved out and the distance between us has grown, I'm happier. I'm happier without all of her drama in my life. I'm more at peace without her poison in my life..BUT...dammit if I don't miss the good times.

I think I will go out and CELEBRATE and if I'm not having fun, I'll just come home. I also need to keep in mind that no matter how she acts NOW, she'll always be who she is. 12 years of friendship has shown me that she won't change.

Here's to the end of a very stressful term! Goodbye winter term! I can't say it was much fun, but I did learn some things. Hello spring term, lets have some FUN!

19 friends have commented:

Marie on March 16, 2010 at 11:46 AM said...

I think you are doing a good thing. Sometimes you just gotta accept what you are gonna get. You don't have to let her take advantage but you guys can still have a good time as pals. I think that since she is not under your roof you will able to dismiss things easier IMO.

Yay for finals!!

Danielle on March 16, 2010 at 12:09 PM said...

I think you should go out and celebrate. If she sucks, then you can leave. I also think if you DIDN'T go, she would make it all about her and how you didn't show up because she was there. She seems like that kind of selfish person.

Congrats to you for surviving your classes!!!! (((HUGS)))

Fertility Chick on March 16, 2010 at 1:01 PM said...

Yay for almost being done finals!!! You've done so awesome!

I agree with the others, go out and celebrate! You deserve it! Like you said, take Peaches for what she is - hopefully celebrations will be good fun and you can carry on from there.

Good luck again, friend! So proud of you!

GeekByMarriage on March 16, 2010 at 1:14 PM said...

My first thought...what does she want now?
So proud of you!!!

Caitlin on March 16, 2010 at 3:13 PM said...

Good luck tonight, doll! I think you should go out and definitely deserve it!

oklaln86 on March 16, 2010 at 6:01 PM said...

How the hell are you in finals already...? I'm at midterm.... Confused!

Quiet Dreams on March 16, 2010 at 6:50 PM said...

Wow! Congrats for completing another milestone along the path! (are you on a quarter system? Strange that your term is finished now...)

Be vewy, vewy careful with Miss Peaches. I hope you have fun tonight. :)

SassyCupcakes on March 16, 2010 at 7:37 PM said...

Go party. You deserve it. And I'm sure you know your boundaries and if she starts crossing the line I'm sure you can walk away and celebrate with other people. You deserve to be happy, you have no obligation to deal with her shit anymore.

Mrs. Gamgee on March 16, 2010 at 9:19 PM said...

I think it's a sign of being a grown up when you can recognize that just because someone is not the person we thought they were (or hoped they were) does not mean you can't have a relationship with them. It just not might be the relationship you had expected. I think it's all about knowing your boundaries, and enforcing them.

Congrats on finishing your term... I hope the final went well, and that you had fun tonight.

'Murgdan' on March 17, 2010 at 3:22 AM said...

Good for you on getting the finals over with! Enjoy your break!!

SS on March 17, 2010 at 6:31 AM said...

Congrats on the last final! HAve some fun- you deserve it-

CanadianMama on March 17, 2010 at 8:40 AM said...

You are right on both counts:
1) She is who she is - you cannot expect her to change.
2) That should not stop you from having fun!
Congrats ont he end of your term and on your BIG FAT A!!!!!!

february405 on March 17, 2010 at 11:25 AM said...

You got it always have a choice, you can go out and celebrate with your friend...(realizing this is past tense) and you can choose to go again in the future if you like. Our emotions often get in the way of us making decisions...I always ask, "what emotion is causing me to not make this decision, fear, anger, regret, etc? If I cold put it aside what would I choose to do?" Love the blog btw! ~@jelliebraden

Kristin on March 17, 2010 at 6:32 PM said...

Way to go D! Congrats on making it through the term despite everything that happened.

Gerardine Baugh on March 17, 2010 at 7:26 PM said...

You are right! people don’t change “Peaches is Peaches and she'll never change.”

As long as you remember that you won’t get hurt. When someone runs over me once, then if I stand in place and let them do it again, well, it’s my fault.

Have fun; just don’t let the drama interfere.

I hope your celebration went well!

Sunny on March 17, 2010 at 7:50 PM said...

Congratulations on finals!! I think you are doing the right thing, going out with your classmates. I know it's hard to build a different kind of relationship with someone you've been close to -- I have so been there! But you are a smart woman and I know you can set boundaries so you don't get drawn into her drama. Have fun!

Flying Monkeys on March 19, 2010 at 2:13 PM said...

Peaches too many times in one sentence makes me start into "Peaches" by POTUS. Sorry.

I agree with Dirty. Play it by ear, it might work out great

I'm glad your finals are over and I'm sure you rocked them!

Jamie on March 19, 2010 at 6:18 PM said...

Good-bye winter term!!

I hope you went out and had a good time. Enjoy Peaches company, but be careful not to fall into the same old roles again.

Congrats on finishing up the term!

Serendipity on March 20, 2010 at 7:27 AM said...

congrats on surviving this term with everything you had going on, I hope you went out to celebrate :)

I agree with Mrs Gamgee about peaches, you can have friends that let you down as long as your only expectation is that they will let you down. People are who they are.

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